Zodiac Signs

Why Do Zodiac Signs Get Married?

“And really, why?” thought our Magic Ball and decided to answer.


Capricorn marries correctly – in fact, exactly the way he does everything else. That is, she meets the right man, tests him in a long relationship, decides that he is worthy, and gets married because this is a perfectly logical consequence of the affair. And the answer to the question “why?” there can be only one: to live happily ever after with her husband, why else? That is, as you understand, we have nothing to console either potential suitors of Capricorn or women of all other signs: first we cannot answer the question “So what to give Capricorn so that she marries me?”, The second we cannot reveal the secret of what How does she do it. Well, we can, but you still can’t.


Aquarius marries not why, but why. Because it happened. She had some children, for example, or yesterday she polished a bottle of tequila with champagne, and today it turned out that an application was submitted – well, don’t back down now! Again, you can always get a divorce, business something. True, our Magic Ball suspects some kind of trick in this, because “business” rarely happens, but for some reason, it cannot prove insidious intent. Or doesn’t want to.


Pisces get married to strengthen the spiritual connection. His own with the dear Universe, and not what you thought. That is, the potential husband, of course, will be told exactly this, and until the end of his days, he will remain in a pleasant illusion that he was still allowed into the incomprehensible inner world of the fish. In fact, of course, his task is to clean the aquarium in time and change it to a better one when the Fish wants to spawn. But no one forbids him to watch, right? Here, let them rejoice.


Aries gets married to try himself as a wife. I mean, everyone ran – and Aries ran to see where everyone was rushing with such enthusiasm – maybe they give something tasty there? Therefore, Aries, as a rule, have more than one marriage: first, you need to run away to get married to see what they give, and only then you can draw conclusions and next time go where they give something more interesting.


Taurus gets married because it is necessary. That is, she needs it: an official proposal, a wedding with a white dress and a warm friendly scuffle, and a stamp on her passport. All other signs can wrinkle their noses as much as they like and talk about philistinism and mossy traditions, but Taurus doesn’t give a damn: she will do everything according to the rules so that later no one has any illusions about further life together. In the future, because everything will also be according to the rules: a car, an apartment, children, a dacha, a Labrador, three cats, geraniums on the window, and a motor cultivator in the barn. And the only item on this list that Taurus is ready to refuse is the Labrador. In a sense, a pit bull will also do if it is fundamentally important to someone.


Geminis get married because it’s profitable. Which, by the way, does not at all mean a necessary material benefit: it means that Gemini in this particular period would be better off married than not. A very, very thick hint about the “length of time”, we hope everyone has been correctly understood. Gemini also gets divorced because it is profitable. That is, she will have to prove to her all her life that she will still be better off in marriage, otherwise, well, excuse me.


Cancers get married to feel safe: you won’t stick out tender parts from under the shell in front of anyone, but in front of your lawful husband – why not? After all, Cancers, as a rule, marry to live together until death separates them from the faithful, so you can at least afford to be yourself with him. However, if the faithful one decides to painfully poke Cancer into the tender, death will separate them pretty quickly. Not necessarily physical, but moral and reputational – certainly. And die, as you understand, not Cancer at all.


Lionesses marry to be fruitful and multiply. You didn’t expect it, did you? Everything that can be obtained from a man in marriage, the Lioness will receive anyway, and then he will crawl after her, offering the rest: a hand, a heart, and other miserable liver. But the Lioness wants to raise children exclusively in marriage. And with a great father. Keep in mind, however, that if you have nothing but a miserable liver, but you are the best friend of all children, you can not offer yourself to the Lioness. An excellent father in her understanding is the same guy who does not get under his feet and does not interfere with raising offspring, but simply asks: “How much money do you need, dear?”


Virgo marries to be friends. So that there is always a smart person at hand with whom you can talk and think about. All other aspects of marriage are not very interesting in Virgo, but she diligently supports them – depending on the wishes of her husband and how they are combined with her principles. It’s not that Virgo was very interested in borscht or children, but smart interlocutors, you know, don’t lie on the road! Go find another one just like it.


Libras get married to be adopted. That is, continue to sit comfortably in the arms of the best, strongest and kindest man in the world and from there look at the world with admiring little eyes, feeling completely safe. Well, in general, you know, it is recommended to check with Libra’s dad whether he read fairy tales to her before bedtime and whether he baked pancakes in the morning. Well, except that she does not need to give dolls. It is necessary to give diamonds (and Dad, by the way, gives!).


Here she is! The very only woman in the horoscope who marries exclusively for great and pure love, and not “why.” That is, how great and pure love is combined with a stamp in the passport, and why it is needed, she, frankly, does not really understand but vaguely feels that it will be more difficult for the victim to flutter in this way. Well, yes, this is love, but what?


Sagittarius marries to become a matriarch. Unfortunately, along with the stamp in the passport, they don’t give out a crowd of respectful adult children and grandchildren who can be fervently taught bad things, otherwise Sagittarius, you know, closer to eighty would decide on this crucial step. And so you have to do everything yourself, but on the other hand, you can start commanding without even waiting for the firstborn. And what? Now she is a wife! Has the right to!

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